tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14078049916468079182024-02-20T02:34:37.388-06:00Not So Fresh FeelingsTrenchant political analysis for them asses. From a student of the craft.notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-79327841021603944522010-06-09T11:17:00.005-05:002010-09-30T12:19:00.036-05:00Litigious Birther Orly Taitz Thanks Supporters for 372,000 Cracks in Padded Ceiling<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAkCYnDukyb3xPCYnbFLKwXDmxg0geNq8MHdT6gVhBq3t-X6bc8Zqr4eKAnZcZD5Fsc7eH5wMTYdFFxfgMzfAbsn5JeMy8yHB3xlbkez1GUpkKEvHwTrDu1Wj7BdOgQwZzPQJlqB2pQAk/s1600/orly.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAkCYnDukyb3xPCYnbFLKwXDmxg0geNq8MHdT6gVhBq3t-X6bc8Zqr4eKAnZcZD5Fsc7eH5wMTYdFFxfgMzfAbsn5JeMy8yHB3xlbkez1GUpkKEvHwTrDu1Wj7BdOgQwZzPQJlqB2pQAk/s200/orly.jpg" width="175" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Orly Taitz, America's most litigious muppet, </span><a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-503544_162-20007188-503544.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">fails to claim the GOP nomination for California Secretary of State. </span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">But 372,000 people did actually cast a ballot for her, so hope is not 100% lost for Birthers. </span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-75180856452666152442010-04-30T13:13:00.015-05:002010-05-27T10:25:40.509-05:00Indiana--America's "Mississippi North"?<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Phil Bailey is keeping it </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/"> "All in the Family"</a>...and taking his "little red riding hood" directly to Grandma's house:</span><br />
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</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKLaxNnoIscE1Ht3SVXryJydsOIXPIloCUqHh5Eq_vk-NYYf-M93TqxOfqq_ULvpH72dvvRreKAZvXF2OGmnDdSs_9ZBnczco14IG9EzhpwzKIatPeXIwdDJtAKjt49oP6HlWO4uPDbGk/s1600/nowaynowaynoway.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKLaxNnoIscE1Ht3SVXryJydsOIXPIloCUqHh5Eq_vk-NYYf-M93TqxOfqq_ULvpH72dvvRreKAZvXF2OGmnDdSs_9ZBnczco14IG9EzhpwzKIatPeXIwdDJtAKjt49oP6HlWO4uPDbGk/s320/nowaynowaynoway.jpg" /></span></a></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/"></a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">From <a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/">Yahoo Lifestyle:</a> </span><br />
<div><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 21px;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 21px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Pearl Carter is positively glowing with joy. She has a handsome new boyfriend, is enjoying an active sex life after many years of celibacy and, amazingly, is preparing to become a mother again.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">But the retired grandmother isn't carrying the baby herself. She and her young lover have spent a staggering $54,000 hiring a surrogate to help them with their dreams of having a child.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">What makes Pearl's decision to become a mum again even more shocking is that her new boyfriend is her biological grandson, 26-year-old Phil Bailey.</span></div></span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Ha! Yes, readers! YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO SCRUB THAT FROM YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS. Consider it my belated April Fools' joke to you. You might as well keep reading:</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 21px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">.....</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">However, the pair makes no apologies for their controversial plan to start their own family.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">'I'm not interested in anyone else's opinion,' Pearl says. 'I am in love with Phil and he's in love with me. Soon I'll be holding my son or daughter in my arms and Phil will be the proud dad'.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Phil adds, 'I love Pearl with all my heart. I've always been attracted to older women and I think Pearl is gorgeous. Now I'm going to be a dad and I can't wait.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 2px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 1px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">'Yes, we get laughed at and bullied when we go out and kiss in public but we don't care. You can't help who you fall for.'</span></div></span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/"></a></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/"></a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I always said Indiana was a little bit of the south, up north. </span><br />
<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">For those of you tuning in from less terrible states, Indiana is a magical place where dads pick their 6-year-old daughters up for custody visits and tell them "coon" jokes on the way to the Dairy Queen.* Where t</span><a href="http://www.historycooperative.org/cgi-bin/justtop.cgi?act=justtop&url=http://www.historycooperative.org/journals/imh/100.3/pickett.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">he holocaust museum gets burned down.</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> And now, thanks to Phil Bailey and his granny, a place where 26-year-olds </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://nz.lifestyle.yahoo.com/new-idea/real-life/article/-/7124792/im-in-love-with-my-grandson-were-having-a-baby/">bone their Nana. </a> </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Over the river and through the woods, to Grandmother's house he...eeew.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">*(Gee, thanks, Dad. And to think, some kids were going to Europe during the summer! At least no one in the family ever questions why I became a comedian. Or voted for Obama.)</span></div></div></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-47821434379080766062010-04-23T18:10:00.012-05:002010-06-01T13:59:49.195-05:00Politician Also Smeared Opponent With Accusations of Not Having Relations With Sexxxy Ducks<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">What is America coming to? Or, more correctly: To What is America Coming? According to one Pennsylvania politico, </span><a href="http://www.advocate.com/News/Daily_News/2010/04/22/Philly_Candidate_Accused_of_Faking_Bisexuality/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Not other dudes,</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> no-way-no-how. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Aspiring PA State Rep Gregg Kravitz <a href="http://www.nowpublic.com/world/pa-rep-accuses-gregg-kravitz-pretending-be-bi-gay-vote">has been accused by his primary opponent</a> of pretending to like peters as much as ladies in a bid to get votes from District-182's other peter-on-peterers. </span><br />
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<blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Veteran Rep. Babette Josephs (D., Phila.) last Thursday accused her primary opponent, Gregg Kravitz, of pretending to be bisexual in order to pander to lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender voters, a powerful bloc in the district.</span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Ergo, according to the <a href="http://www.doublex.com/blog/oystersgarter/why-you-dont-want-do-it-duck">Pat Robertsonian Law of Homo Physics,</a> our great nation's </span><a href="http://www.doublex.com/blog/oystersgarter/why-you-dont-want-do-it-duck"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">sexy, sexy ducks are not getting any furtive love</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">, either from the supposedly rainbow-spangled Mr. Kravitz . And w</span></span>hy have <b><i>we</i></b> not jumped on making clucky-clucky long time? Is it because we--the obese, insolvent, blogging, public are too busy fapping away to graven images of </span><a href="http://mediamatters.org/mmtv/200905070024"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">our nation's eminent thinker on matters of buttsexxing and the sex lives of domestic animals, Pat Robertson</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">? The Devil doth tempt our flesh and whatnot!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Here is Robertson telling America's homos/ducklovers where to send the bill. Or maybe he is recounting that conservative Alaska cruise where he played doctor with Larry Craig. Either way, he appears to have momentarily lost focus on the family.</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbkmUP7SE75_P2MpDfmIDhWC_e1HX1C1hSvQt1UBjyxUY0_tn_eBV0ouofL6yY1B02or_-dGLN1pEc86AyQmHYWqqDh1huLgn5uIxUs9m78R1VejdS800sNaUfLPsLCW1Xk1PODQ5XDCc/s1600/patrobertson.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="316" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbkmUP7SE75_P2MpDfmIDhWC_e1HX1C1hSvQt1UBjyxUY0_tn_eBV0ouofL6yY1B02or_-dGLN1pEc86AyQmHYWqqDh1huLgn5uIxUs9m78R1VejdS800sNaUfLPsLCW1Xk1PODQ5XDCc/s320/patrobertson.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">But debauched elite limousine coastal welfare queen liberals are fighting back with a gay agenda of their own:</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/EXPcBI4CJc8&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/EXPcBI4CJc8&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object></span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9_uDHLtzAF5oNZIIMXGZAlyUyhhzVXiZjzDMG1fE9l40EZixvEI5_tByh_7rcKs_FoBzF5guC-GPzW0fo-ZNzFenPAnqWlnyBhciAQxBIOT7J68IlXYqJdMSKbMwsVw7ShfUt9QR8whY/s1600/gay2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="135" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9_uDHLtzAF5oNZIIMXGZAlyUyhhzVXiZjzDMG1fE9l40EZixvEI5_tByh_7rcKs_FoBzF5guC-GPzW0fo-ZNzFenPAnqWlnyBhciAQxBIOT7J68IlXYqJdMSKbMwsVw7ShfUt9QR8whY/s200/gay2.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">What's next? <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2004/ALLPOLITICS/08/12/mcgreevey.transcript/">"I am a Duck-fucking American!??"</a></span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-65199565471314168442010-04-23T17:33:00.002-05:002010-04-23T17:34:28.640-05:00Signs of the APOCALYPSE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDS0jhE3d3O9t5_o3j7g2HyT1KM4n6BFczKfko0GwH-YzuEXRId-66e4K5BLJ5P1sPjWiQn8hrizQrr8X2sY1Esf36EvtjLbmhPgSDqrXv_NBqlOvYbXeZX6MaahgoLYSDGu37_SLC2g4/s1600/realityschool.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDS0jhE3d3O9t5_o3j7g2HyT1KM4n6BFczKfko0GwH-YzuEXRId-66e4K5BLJ5P1sPjWiQn8hrizQrr8X2sY1Esf36EvtjLbmhPgSDqrXv_NBqlOvYbXeZX6MaahgoLYSDGu37_SLC2g4/s320/realityschool.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span></span></span></span></span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-43014446517328485422010-04-22T08:22:00.005-05:002010-05-27T13:24:28.866-05:00Happy Ending are Forever<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;"></span><br />
<div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">What do I look for in a man besides someone who won’t go out for a pack of cigarettes and never come back? The same things we all want: mental stimulation, sexual intuitiveness, and someone to tickle-fight with under our ironic <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h05ZQ7WHw8Y">snuggies</a>. </span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">But to find this person, how about mixing it up a bit? Taking a novel approach to the event, how about a first date so subtly skewed that the two of you could bond over the absurdity of it?</span></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Why, you ask, would anyone want to have a date go wrong on purpose? Simple, to have some outside force to bond in opposition to...To have some outside force to which you are in opposition--oh, fuck you grammar nazis. </span></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So why not head to Chinatown and try something like this? </span></b></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 36pt; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">1. </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Would you like feet with that? </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Find the restaurant with the most menacing hanging-poultry display you’ve ever seen and get a double order of chicken feet. Will they be relieved when you go for Thai on the second date? Will you find out they </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">like</span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> to eat feet? Either way…win.</span></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 36pt; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=1407804991646807918&postID=4301444651732848542" name="graphic05"></a><img alt="" height="241" src="https://docs.google.com/File?id=dcpdmmtz_139rgc2jcfj_b" width="320" /></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a name='more'></a></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><ul style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><ol start="2" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><li class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0pt; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">S</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">troll down </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">counterfeit</span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">alley. </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Find out how your politics match up</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> with</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">a debate over handbags & watches.</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Children make those!</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">”</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">H</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">uman trafficking? Wh</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">o cares, this </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">‘</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Gu</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">chi</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">’</span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">is sick</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">!</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">”</span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">conflict causes sexual tension to </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">flare up like electricity conducting </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">off a </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">balloon made by children paid 18 </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">cents an hour rubbed against some lady's mink coat on the <a href="http://gawker.com/5520013/upper-east-side-poised-on-the-brink-of-chaos">UES</a>.</span></span></span></li>
</ol></ul><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 36pt; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=1407804991646807918&postID=4301444651732848542" name="graphic06"></a><img alt="Stock Photo titled: Handbag Vendors Selling Knockoff Handbags On Canal Street Lower Manhattan New York City New York USA., USE OF THIS IMAGE WITHOUT PERMISSION IS PROHIBITED" height="245" src="https://docs.google.com/File?id=dcpdmmtz_140kzh26ddm_b" width="320" /></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><ul style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><ol start="3" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><li class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0pt; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Close </span></i></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">encounters with the bus-driving k</span></i></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">ind. </span></i></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Catch </span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">the </span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">$12 </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Chinatown </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">express bus to the city of brotherly love to cheer the Giants against the Phillies and unite </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">against a common enemy</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">…</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The bus driver, wit</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">h </span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">his </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">stimulating</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">” </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">cad</span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">ence of accelerate/brake/accelerate/brake/rinse/repeat. </span></span></span></li>
</ol></ul><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 36pt; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=1407804991646807918&postID=4301444651732848542" name="graphic07"></a><img alt="" height="166" src="https://docs.google.com/File?id=dcpdmmtz_141k5pn56d6_b" width="245" /></span></div></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><ul style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><ol start="4" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><li class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0pt; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Foot</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">”</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span" style="text-decoration: none;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> massage at </span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">some</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> on-the-DL-looking</span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">massage place</span></i></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">. </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Regroup after</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">wards</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> to </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">l</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">augh to</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">gether at </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">overhearing </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">others</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">’</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> pay-to-play. </span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> P</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">a</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">rtitions instead of</span></span><span class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> walls? Sweet.</span></span></li>
</ol></ul><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/post-edit.g?blogID=1407804991646807918&postID=4301444651732848542" name="graphic08"></a><img alt="" height="320" src="https://docs.google.com/File?id=dcpdmmtz_142ffzxwj8q_b" width="308" /> </span></div></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">It is said that </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">all</span></span></span><span class="apple_002dconverted_002dspace__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dconverted_002dspace__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> is</span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> fair in love and </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">war. </span></span></span><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="apple_002dstyle_002dspan__Char Apple-style-span"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Well, waterboarding isn’t fair (in spite of the best efforts of <a href="http://gawker.com/5520841/torture-memo-author-john-yoo-gets-own-toilet-paper-brand">John Yoo</a>) but engineering a date to have just enough danger, drama, and bulk dried sea foods on display doesn't violate the Geneva Conventions. Sometimes a smooth ride is a dull ride, but happy endings are forever. </span></span></span></div><div class="Normal_0020_0028Web_0029" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><br />
</div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-19624293036083951062010-04-21T14:29:00.013-05:002010-06-09T21:24:05.303-05:00BREAKING: Tea Party Crashers EXPOSED as Conservative Group<div style="margin-bottom: 0.1pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0.1pt;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">But who is behind it?</span></u></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">UPDATE:</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">An internet conservative group</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">has been caught </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">waging a dirty campaign to slander Democrats. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">This nameless group</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> of conservative trolls created a Facebook group entitled </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">"Crash the</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Tea</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Party</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">” and falsely attributed its creation and administration to a </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“a</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Nationwide </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Network of </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Democrats.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">” </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Check out this screen grab I </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">pulled</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> on Friday, April 16 from the google cache of “Crash the Tea Party” Facebook group:</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNPQFINpyfMYuDhmUQcp_gc34Q46Nr85R5oY8AO10RLp-O3JZED98r40RZVNtRLJyM4emk285yytLkLvcFf4wP6yRI6w7rc7ZtCiRKF7M6_orenielvHL0cl68xFkkOkJhAIk2mwLDdXQ/s1600/crashers4+dems.jpg" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><img alt="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNPQFINpyfMYuDhmUQcp_gc34Q46Nr85R5oY8AO10RLp-O3JZED98r40RZVNtRLJyM4emk285yytLkLvcFf4wP6yRI6w7rc7ZtCiRKF7M6_orenielvHL0cl68xFkkOkJhAIk2mwLDdXQ/s640/crashers4+dems.jpg" height="359" src="https://docs.google.com/File?id=dcpdmmtz_135dq5ffnft_b" style="border-bottom-style: none; border-bottom-width: 0px; border-color: initial; border-color: initial; border-left-style: none; border-left-width: 0px; border-right-style: none; border-right-width: 0px; border-style: initial; border-top-style: none; border-top-width: 0px; border-width: initial;" width="592" /></span></a></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">As you can see, there is no mention of right-wing affiliation and a bald-faced lie about ”who we are.”</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a name='more'></a></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The administrators of the Facebook page have since removed the false </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">affiliation</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">, but continue to manage the group, tacitly acknowledging their involvement. The page has curiously been scrubbed but a cached page is still available. This is entirely separate from that guy out in Oregon, who really did want to start a bag-off.</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">You can check <a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1649901418">their </a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1649901418">Facebook </a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.facebook.com/crashtheteaparty">group</a> here</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> as it currently appears</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">. </span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Can’t you just imagine the soliloquy that gave rise to this great </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">idea:</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 36pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">“</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Those </span><a href="http://fromthefoothills.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/9-12-socialism-fascism-bo.jpg" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">fasci</span></u></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">s</span></u></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">t</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Liberals! When they are not busy</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Hating the Troops™</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">by fussing about all that </span><a href="http://www.halliburtonwatch.org/" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Halliburton nonsense</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> and </span><a href="http://www.newyorker.com/archive/2003/03/31/030331fa_fact1" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">yellowcake uranium</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">eggtimer</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> props made from</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><a href="http://wnwbeauty.com/Product.php?Pid=66" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Wet n' Wild</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">, they are Crashing on </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Real</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Americans'</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100125131251AAP56hS" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">God-Given Right</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> to protest </span><a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1108/15306.html" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">the Tyranny of Free & Open Landslide Elections!</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">”</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So what’s with these two-faced Right Wingers</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">?</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-left: 0pt; margin-right: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">L</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">ooks like they</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">loved </span><a href="http://gawker.com/5498123/michele-bachmann-cannot-spell-america-or-congresswoman" style="color: #551a8b;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: blue;"><u><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Amarica</span></u></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> enough to plop down at the AOL-machine and fashion a Troll Page to end all Troll Pages. Bravo!</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The same people who don't know Stephen Colbert is satire were, let's say, "ripe" for some punking:</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyJCgEUxtggjA63PnaDxYNuQ4O8iaLmlqPg47lAAhqcNWGnkjxdSYowdK-n6RDyZLIJe2V-7X1xYxpu4ORk7Nu4vtj8W47vANJvLuQCHqlDC732CjYfu_cAbftkcee0qbsKtt4KdjsxbA/s1600/YR+punkd.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="388" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyJCgEUxtggjA63PnaDxYNuQ4O8iaLmlqPg47lAAhqcNWGnkjxdSYowdK-n6RDyZLIJe2V-7X1xYxpu4ORk7Nu4vtj8W47vANJvLuQCHqlDC732CjYfu_cAbftkcee0qbsKtt4KdjsxbA/s640/YR+punkd.jpg" width="640" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> That's </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">meta</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">. Trolls, trolled.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">*<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">(It's not the Young Republicans as earlier thought. My apologies to them, </span><a href="http://wonkette.com/409676/young-republicans-leader-gal-thinks-its-super-funny-to-call-president-obama-a-coon-because-he-is-black/"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">they can go back</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> to their shuffleboard now. Apparently on facebook, the referrer page shows up in the url. Lesson learned.)</span></span></span></div></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-74356714297521893432010-04-20T12:13:00.001-05:002010-04-20T12:19:54.374-05:00Memory Lane: I Knew Obama Had Won It When I Saw This Photo<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://twitter.com/McCainsJOWLS"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtmdUCCd2QfwN8udKI1jzLNuoX743F4ne60WEZZiQ5WJt0ZH_NgbwGrOVjhF8ovl9C1awQK9xppVBeCK1aWclolVqtAFerYqmC8BEsWskuJLRR7sAUmfJYGKKOyCc3X_5rLrgi-FKPwSE/s640/jowlsupclose.jpg" width="477" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">My god. Even his jowls have jowls! Well done! Follow John McCain's jowls on twitter: </span><a href="http://twitter.com/McCainsJOWLS"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">@McCainsJOWLS</span></a></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-88074411507889528282010-04-16T12:18:00.004-05:002010-04-20T12:08:55.630-05:00Your truly--OUTED!!! As the Voice of Mitch McConnells' Jowls on Twitter! Roll Call's Heard on the Hill Has the Story<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.rollcall.com/issues/55_95/hoh/43646-1.html?CMP=OTC-RSS">Senate Minority leader Mitch McConnells Face Flaps o' Family values...on Twitter</a></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgDfqrPBSqqdEEXLuTwRgYAeXIbMOfI7ogkKKDiCVUH1LCU8sBKf8AQQuEHOJ_BEuxtdKd3ym7wIcACx30ys_vqofGLMBML-8wSZRQ2eNOHBvZW1pHBqava4WhDvbpwkbPjQ2_04LOFD4/s1600/jowltastic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgDfqrPBSqqdEEXLuTwRgYAeXIbMOfI7ogkKKDiCVUH1LCU8sBKf8AQQuEHOJ_BEuxtdKd3ym7wIcACx30ys_vqofGLMBML-8wSZRQ2eNOHBvZW1pHBqava4WhDvbpwkbPjQ2_04LOFD4/s320/jowltastic.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://twitter.com/McConnellsJowls">It's a Jowl-Off, ladies and gentlemens</a></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
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</span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirNP3OxnBqDqRHpfFhvoEXG_HfX0Ef-K173PHeABcgZNOtUWJATOMA__X7FfjPfkORNFENiRtchdlAqje4N0i1HplGSnMdgVoaf2aLUdTrhC3FvD0Dy7HETjqZs9RcEe8naiwf0PTrj1k/s1600/jowlsupclose.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirNP3OxnBqDqRHpfFhvoEXG_HfX0Ef-K173PHeABcgZNOtUWJATOMA__X7FfjPfkORNFENiRtchdlAqje4N0i1HplGSnMdgVoaf2aLUdTrhC3FvD0Dy7HETjqZs9RcEe8naiwf0PTrj1k/s320/jowlsupclose.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://twitter.com/McCainsJOWLS">HENNGGHH?</a></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5RMDNur16DN2jkdputfAA_sNfqbrrM-uvHbRBRaKdzBbYyOV2rJPRZCvU75XOQ7cUqtkgqVN8Y2cd7R_KIZUa4hS_3haoVOx_AqgI7Aom7hTTI2WHZSGNeiPEoVuOfF5sRLUF2Hbyn5c/s1600/liebermancrop.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5RMDNur16DN2jkdputfAA_sNfqbrrM-uvHbRBRaKdzBbYyOV2rJPRZCvU75XOQ7cUqtkgqVN8Y2cd7R_KIZUa4hS_3haoVOx_AqgI7Aom7hTTI2WHZSGNeiPEoVuOfF5sRLUF2Hbyn5c/s320/liebermancrop.jpg" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://twitter.com/JOWLS4Lieberman">JOWLS 4 Lieberman</a></span></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-2403094173563474242010-04-14T14:15:00.038-05:002010-04-23T18:13:37.831-05:00Crash the ‘Bag! What I Learned at the TEA Party...w/video<div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Have you never, ever, been called a n*gger, communist, faggot-lover, or America-hater? </b></span></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br />
</b></span></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Has it NEVER been shouted that you, personally, are financed by a vast Jew Conspiracy which also controls a New World Order from a secret underground Jew lair in Tel Aviv/Manhattan/Chicago? </b></span></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br />
</b></span></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0c343d;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Ladies, have you NEVER BEFORE been called a 'cunt,' 'whore,' or other hearty Christian colloquialisms? </b></span></span></i><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><i>NOW IS YOUR CHANCE!!!!</i></span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><i></i></span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #660000;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><i><a name='more'></a></i></span></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">This Thursday, join the Real Americans® of </span><st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">America</span></st1:place></st1:country-region><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">©, the TEA Party, for a massive 'bag-off in the nation’s capitol or in your very own, ProAmerica™ American hometown! The pasty ballsacks of Liberty <a href="http://www.selectsmart.com/DISCUSS/read.php?16,754906">must be watered from time to time with the blood</a> of Reality! Rumor has it that Chuck Norris will be there!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Watch!</i></span> As </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;">tax</span> cuts</span></span></b></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> by a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_jZdkCFAUw">Hawaiian-born</a> half-black president elected in a <a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1108/15306.html">free, open, landslide election</a> will be transformed BEFORE YOUR VERY EYES into</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #073763;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;">tax</span> increases</span></span></b></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> on every Real* American...Which are then enforced by federal agents costumed as Adolf Hitler menacingly pissing on violators from a blackhawk helicopter...all while George Soros himself trains the rear gunnery on Your Grandma! (*white)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">See!</span></i> How two lesbians having the same basic civil rights as Britney Spears and Newt Gingrich will unleash a plague of <a href="http://badattitudes.com/MT/archives/2008/09/mandatory_abort.html">MANDATORY GAY ABORTIONS</a> on a junior high in your neighborhood! Bible weevils ain't got nuthin' on <a href="https://secure.ga0.org/02/pp2009">Planned Parenthood!</a></span><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">Be There When!</span></i> The keys to <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/CancerPreventionAndTreatment/story?id=4038257&page=1">CIGNA’s actual 100% real death panels that actually 100% really decide which of their customers lives and which dies, slowly,</a> will be handed over to <a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1108/15306.html">democratically elected public officials</a>, who were "voted" on at regular intervals by the "people"--in democratic and open elections by the very same public they were elected to govern. THIS IS KNOWN AS SOCIALISM. AND GAYNESS. These "public officials" will then prevent teenagers from being denied their liver transplants! But not really! Because we ALL KNOW that <a href="http://thinkprogress.org/2009/09/28/thousands-texans-health/">more people</a> having access to timely medical care in doctors’ offices and not <a href="http://videocafe.crooksandliars.com/heather/rachel-maddow-show-wendell-potter-health-c">barn stalls</a>/<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/09/business/09emergency.html">emergency room</a>s <b>equals</b> <i>Obama actually swallowing your Grandma whole! </i><b>Islamically!</b> Cuz <a href="http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/267141/march-10-2010/survival-seed-bank">it said so on Glenn Beck's</a> Blackboard of Absolute Truth. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/12/11/stewart-catches-glenn-bec_n_388362.html">BUY GOLD!</a></span><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Last October I had the honor of attending the Michelle Bachmann Rally on the capitol. As the <a href="http://crooksandliars.com/karoli/cnn-joins-great-american-tea-party-express">Koch Industries</a> and <a href="http://www.prwatch.org/node/8960">FreedumbWorks</a> buses pulled onto the astroturf before me, I felt a sense of pride in the Real America®. We are at the forefront, yet again. This time, we get to see unspooling before us, a grand social experiment. The product of decades of shoddy education stands before you on the nations capitol or your local patch of grass--witness a great wailing about dinosaur bones being planted in the crust of the earth by Satan himself to trick humans into voting for Democrats as the tremors reach the upper chambers of congress. Recoil from a gnashing of teeth that "something just isn't right" about America, now that this new president, who some say is the beast 666 incarnate--has regulated an industry that citizens have begged be reined in since the Kennedy administration. By which I mean the President has obviously come to rape white ladies in their homes, <a href="http://www.mihummel.com/">in front of the Hummels!</a> YES! Socialism=Hitler=Health Insurance regulations=welfare queens skull-fucking Freedom itself! And it all *hearts* fascism. Allah Akhbar!</span><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">BUT! If you <i>are</i> ready to have things seared into your psyche that you will likely wish you could un-see, here are some ideas for how to make the most of your day crashing the Tea Party.</span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal"></div></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Now, I won’t be 'bagcrashing, myself. The experience of wading through the sea of retirees so angry that they want the Government outta their Medicare…well, let’s say my tree of crazy has been watered with the blood of the <a href="http://gay.americablog.com/2010/01/nom-making-calls-for-scott-brown.html">gay agenda</a> or whatever, quite enough, thank you very much. But let's peer deep into MY 'BAGFILES...</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Goods, getting of</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Good mics are essential. Be mic’d (with it on) at all times. Often the best 'baggery will happen when you are en route, not stationed in a patriogasmic display of jingoistic patriotism. For example, I went with a satirical group (not 'bagcrashers/impersonators) and we would walk for a while trhough the crowd, find a nice spot and do some singing, etc. The 3 cameras could not be focused on all of us, from all angles, at all times, leaving some of the best ‘bagging sadly undocumented. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The polite and classy patriot in the video below first used her bullhorn directly in my ear and then hit me with it. I only got my cameraphone out when I realized the main cameras didn’t catch it. Keep at least your voice recording app running at all times to augment the cameras' mics. I should have pressed charges but I didn’t see any cops around at the moment and the more one lingers with teadrama, the more loons will be attracted like a catholic priest to deaf minors at a NAMBLA convention. (apologies for sideways video, working on it)</span><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">This gentleman (in plaid shirt, at about :50, the other, "George Soros" guy is just a bonus loon) followed next to me saying: “You cunt. You dirty whore. Look at you in that skirt you bitch. Put on some clothes. You nasty cunt.” I pulled the camera phone out and asked him if he wanted to state his name and he totally changed his demeanor. Watch: </span><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>Security, necessary measures of</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I personally won’t go to a teabag rally again after the last experience, except as an observer, soaking in the spectacle without being a target of it. Even if the tea baggers almost NEVER <i><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_603703969">get</a></i><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2006/05/24/delay-thinks-colbert-is-r_n_21567.html"> the satire</a>, someone still figures you aren’t one of them and sounds the ACORN alarm. So keep in mind some security precautions.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Don’t go alone. If you do some impersonations/comedy/whatever, have people with you who appear to be unrelated observers. Don’t have everybody doing the same thing--you will be surrounded with no way out of the cacophony of crazy. An old man yelling that you are a welfare queens will be joined by some angry ladies calling you ACORN, then before you know it the NWO stuff starts up and you will quickly learn to dislike crowds. And probably old white people.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">There are plainclothes Capitol police around, as well as uniformed police officers. Try to remember where the uniformed officers are in case you need them. Camera microphones are not very good for loud crowds and boom mics probably aren’t practical. So keep a smaller camera running at all times, in your hand. Some of the most impressive crazytown happens when camera-savvy 'baggers will sidle up next to you while you walk and whisper or speak in a low voice directly at you. (This is when I found out I was financed by the Jews/Israel/the NWO/ George Soros/N*ggers/Islam-o-ricans, etc. )</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>ACORN, tea bag obsession with</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">When someone starts to scream ACORN and point at you, turn and point at someone else and <i>call them ACORN</i> to deflect it. Keep moving on. Then nobody knows exactly *who* is destroying </span><st1:place w:st="on"><st1:country-region w:st="on"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">America</span></st1:country-region></st1:place><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> by trying to get foreclosure help for some cafeteria worker or register a cleaning lady to vote. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">So this Thursday, <i>Christ himself</i> wants you to tread on over to your local patch of grass (or America's capitol/the Birthplace of the baby Jesus, Washington, DC) and stand up for Freedoms and Healthcares. Consider yourself awared. <a href="http://taxdayteaparty.com/">See you there!</a> </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Also on: <a href="http://www.dailykos.com/story/2010/4/15/857553/-What-I-learned-CRASHING-THE-TEA-PARTY-(adults-only)">DailyKos</a></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Bonus Reel: Grandpa McKickass moves to takes off his jacket, menacingly. Then rethinks it, and turns around. (Better view of same in legit vid following at :50)</span><br />
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<object height="364" width="445"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/GHUr6qF6IR8&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/GHUr6qF6IR8&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="445" height="364"></embed></object></div></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-34353758340003211022010-04-11T08:47:00.002-05:002010-04-25T22:34:35.907-05:00Presented Without Comment<object height="364" width="445"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HnnnlkIiqsM&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b&border=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HnnnlkIiqsM&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x5d1719&color2=0xcd311b&border=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="445" height="364"></embed></object>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-58259249517878127232010-03-17T18:13:00.005-05:002010-03-18T19:00:04.031-05:00Not at all St. Patty's-themed, but here's a sketch!<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH2a3-zgJXmomsKT2zoaGQBotTWCd2-GrovH6F1DpzEp1ZmUy_UAgBi5_iZB-vxMdcMV7fb6NS_0kF53MqXTsx4NX2nILqOi_03o9LZnoG_7zbOe5qPuAmMCGnKbJcuhzeFw6x9Ke4I3A/s1600-h/pattison.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH2a3-zgJXmomsKT2zoaGQBotTWCd2-GrovH6F1DpzEp1ZmUy_UAgBi5_iZB-vxMdcMV7fb6NS_0kF53MqXTsx4NX2nILqOi_03o9LZnoG_7zbOe5qPuAmMCGnKbJcuhzeFw6x9Ke4I3A/s320/pattison.jpg" /></a></div><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">SKELETEL: </span><st1:place w:st="on"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">MOBILE</span></st1:place><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"> PHONE SERVICE FOR THE DEAD</span><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Copyright Penny Hollaway 2010<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Characters:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN (Like the VERIZON GUY)<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE OPERATOR<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE CUSTOMER<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE WHITE GUY <o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE LADY<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE BLACK GUY<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>GHOST<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>VAMPIRES</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE MOB<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>CALLER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
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</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(OPEN ON <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:placename w:st="on">CALL</st1:placename> <st1:placetype w:st="on">CENTER</st1:placetype></st1:place> WITH CUBICLES)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN </b>(V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">There's a new mobile phone company<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">that's leaving others...in the<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">dust.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE OPERATOR</b> <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(over the shoulder shot,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">she is facing a computer screen,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">we only see the back of<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">her head )<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Skeletel Mobile phone service for<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the dead. How may I help you?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE CUSTOMER</b> (V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Hegh! Arrgh! Brains!!!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE OPERATOR</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Let me connect you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"><a name='more'></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO FIELD<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">AT NIGHT)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Finally a mobile phone service made<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">just for you-<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO ZOMBIE<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">WHITE GUY ON<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">PHONE)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE WHITE GUY </b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Hengh! Raaa!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b> (V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">With no contract as long as you<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">remain undead-<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(<st1:city w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">SPLIT</st1:place></st1:city> SCREEN<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">AS ZOMBIE WHITE GUY <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">TALKS ON PHONE<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">TO ZOMBIE LADY)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE LADY</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Arrgh! Brains?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b> (V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">And, with all the convenience<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">you've come to expect. You can pay<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">your bill online by credit card, or<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">at one of our stores, with cash,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">check or brains<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(<st1:city w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">SPLIT</st1:place></st1:city> SCREEN 4<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">WAYS)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(4 ZOMBIES chatting on<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">mobile phones)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE BLACK GUY</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Where the brains at? Hengh!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN </b>(V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">So if you are the kind of dead guy<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">who is more interested in a data<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">plan than a burial plan--<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(SCREEN SPLITS<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">6 WAYS )<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(Four zombies from cast plus Farah Fawcett & the</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">guy VP Dick Cheney shot in the face while hunting are</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">talking on mobile phones)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Whether you're undead or just plain old dead-dead, </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">craving blood, brains, or just revenge, we've </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">got a plan for all of you--</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO GHOST)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(offscreen hand gives mobile phone to GHOST, who lacks the<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">density to hold it and drops it)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">We've got the network that goes all<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the places YOU go<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">SPOKESMAN<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">BURIED IN A<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">CASKET)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(Phone rings, SPOKESMAN opens eyes, turns and answers phone)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(SHOT OF GRAVE<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">WITH HEADSTONE)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(muffled) WHA wa wa wawa?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(ADDA: Can you hear me now?)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">VAMPIRES IN A<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">DARK ALLEY)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(Several vampires are texting)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">So don't let your mobile plan bleed you dry</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-family: Courier;">(VAMPIRES notice camera operator, start moving fiendishly towards him, camera drops and camera operator runs away, sound of footsteps running away)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><br />
</span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO: ADDA: Verizon's </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">red 3G coverage </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">map appears </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">normally then </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">is slowly </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">covered in blood)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Other mobile carriers brag about<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">their coverage... but if it's dead zones </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">you're looking for, look no further than Skeletel!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">With special features for the<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">undead, like voice-dialing for<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">those with lost appendages-<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE OPERATOR</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(in an pre-recorded, automated voice)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">To dial by name, press 1 or say,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"Aargh",<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">(Sound of "1" being pressed)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Now dialing: Dick Cheney<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO A<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">CEMETARY AT<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">NIGHT)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(standing atop a hill)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Sign up now and get free unlimited<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">calling to some of the places you call</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the most: Like Purgatory, <st1:state w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Indiana</st1:place></st1:state>, and </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">all 10 circles of Hell.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">And! Go to skeletel.com and download</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">free skins for your touchscreen<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CROWD OF<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">ZOMBIES APPEARS<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">BEHIND<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">SPOKESMAN)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>ZOMBIE MOB</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Skins! Hengh! Raa! SKINS!!!!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">ZOMBIES reach for SPOKESMAN menacingly.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>SPOKESMAN</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(Beginning to look alarmed, starts walking away briskly from<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">ZOMBIES, they follow him down the hill, he begins running)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Can anybody hear me now? AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT BACK TO<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">CALL CENTER )<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE OPERATOR</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(Turns from computer to face camera, the FEMALE OPERATOR is a<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">skeleton with a wig on)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Skeletel Mobile service...for us,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">by us. Ah haha ha ha ha!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT BACK TO<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">SPOKESMAN IN<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">CEMETARY)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>CALLER</b> (V.O)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(As SPOKESMAN is being torn apart by ZOMBIES)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">You're breaking up!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(SPOKESMAN's arm is thrown through the shot)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><br />
<div><br />
</div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-19633901284017490282010-03-01T13:42:00.010-06:002010-04-21T17:19:29.580-05:00Time Machine: A Few Years In the Future, After Healthcare Begins Its Assault on Our Way of Life....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgl6prHDF1swqL9ch4pDhW6cB9Zf0kfg5I68imICa1Y_WUi-S9IWXgKaZ_m862gtpzE0aTgwQ7f6LAYRqjqXU5rbYkbgoWQQMkTcwAxRgyBxiMlxtFy_oJQYNUTU6G582EwX9RQvoD7dLo/s1600-h/palin-death-panel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgl6prHDF1swqL9ch4pDhW6cB9Zf0kfg5I68imICa1Y_WUi-S9IWXgKaZ_m862gtpzE0aTgwQ7f6LAYRqjqXU5rbYkbgoWQQMkTcwAxRgyBxiMlxtFy_oJQYNUTU6G582EwX9RQvoD7dLo/s320/palin-death-panel.jpg" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">THE SUNSHINE COMMISSION</span></b></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(c)2010 Penny Hollaway</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">CHARACTERS:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA, </b>7 years old<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MOM,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MALE ANNOUNCER,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE ANNOUNCER,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FREE SPIRITED LADY,<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>GRANNY, </b>elderly woman in housedress<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">( OPEN ON: KITCHEN IN SUBURBS)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">( MOM is seated at table)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(JOSHUA enters with bookbag.)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">I accidented in my pants today at<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">school, Momma.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MOM</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Oh, sweetheart...<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Madison Mendez told me that she is </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">going to report me to the</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"Department of Homeland Youth In<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><st1:place w:st="on"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Asia</span></st1:place><span style="font-family: Courier;">." Cuz I spit in her purple<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">play-dough.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">She said that Sarah Palin was on TV<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">sayin' that the president will make<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(annunciates awkwardly)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"mild-artistic" kids like me into<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">glue.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(JOSHUA cries and rubs his eyes)<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;">con't after the jump--------></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"><a name='more'></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MOM</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Oh, Josh, don't worry!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">The Department of Homeland<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Euthanasia is nothing to be afraid<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">of! It's what helps <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">America</st1:place></st1:country-region><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">progress!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Our President Obama has even given<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">it a new name, The Sunshine<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Commission.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">(MOM comforts JOSHUA)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO SKY<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">WITH CLOUDS<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">PARTING & SUN<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">RISING)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE ANNOUNCER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(voice over)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(soothing, upbeat voice)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">It really is a bright, new day at<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the Sunshine Commission.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Imagine not having to stress<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">yourself out worrying if you are too old, challenged, or otherwise<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">un-viable for actually contributing<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">meaningfully to society. Especially if you are old. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">President Obama's Sunshine<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Commission is here to help you<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">reach a legally-binding decision on<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">all of your life-ending needs and<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">wishes.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO BEACH,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">FREE-SPIRITED<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">LADY RIDING ON<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">HORSEBACK AT<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">SUNSET)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FREE SPIRITED LADY</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">I can swim, play tennis, go for a<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">run...I don't have to think about<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">what my disabled--wait, sorry--<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(looks away, pained expression)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"non-contributing" son Jaden is<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">doing. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(takes a deep breath and grins wildly)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">The Sunshine Commission gave him to<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">a nice farm family! Thats what his<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Case Administrator said!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(rides off into sunset)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MALE ANNOUNCER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">That's right, Janet! No need to be reminded of</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">how the <a href="http://www.newsleader.com/article/20100222/NEWS01/2220318">Lord punished </a>you for<o:p></o:p></span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">demonstrating at that anti-war<o:p></o:p></span></div></div><span style="font-family: Courier;">rally!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;">But The Sunshine Commission is so<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">much more...<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;">(turns and faces other camera)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">Are you a Senior Citizen, nearing the</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">blossoming of your obsolescence?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Well, <a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1267470983479">you don't have to trouble<o:p></o:p></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1267470983479">your nutrient-rich little heads<o:p></o:p></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Sp-VFBbjpE">anymore</a>--The Sunshine Commission<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">has eliminated the terrifying<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">prospect of expensive hospital<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">stays and futile end-of-life care.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO A SCENE<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">OF A GRANNY ON<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">HER SOFA IN A<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">FLOWERY<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">HOUSEDRESS)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(GRANNY flips through channels on TV, finds infommercial for<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">personal hygiene wiping stick, <a href="http://www.poopreport.com/Consumer/Content/Bottom/bottom.html">"Freedom Wand"</a> and sighs in<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">resignation)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(turns to camera)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>GRANNY</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Sometimes, enough IS enough.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(CUT TO KITCHEN<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">SCENE)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MALE ANNOUNCER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(facing off camera)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">That's right, Mrs. Felderstein.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(facing camera again)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Imagine not having to stick around<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">to have your shameful private parts<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">wiped by resentful minimum wage<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">ACORN flunkies in some ghastly<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">beige strip mall retirement home.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Now you can have all of your<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">meaning-of-life questions answered<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">by the benevolent authority of the<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Federal Government.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA'S MOM</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Now, isn't healthcare reform fun?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(MOM and JOSHUA smile and nod at each other)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MOM</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(MOM directs question to MALE ANNOUNCER)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">But what about special-needs kids<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">like my Joshua?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>MALE ANNOUNCER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;">(speaks to camera)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Are you or <a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1267478199787">someone the Lord has<o:p></o:p></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><a href="http://www.newsleader.com/article/20100222/NEWS01/2220318">punished you with</a>, Developmentally<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Challenged?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Now, every citizen of Limited<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Ableness can--<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">and will--<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">participate in an Omnibus Auditing<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Assessment and come away knowing</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">for sure, </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"Should they....?"<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Sounds neat, Momma!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA'S MOM</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(speaking directly into camera)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">You see--It wasn't little Josh's<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">fault I ate sushi off of a Teflon<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">pan every single day of my<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">pregnancy and didn't quit my job at<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the dry cleaning plant!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">But now my little Josh can pull himself up by<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">his bootstraps and find out his<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">very own Social Contribution<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Quotient. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Should he score under an<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">"8", he will know it's time to<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">visit the "President's Office of<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Opt-out Initiatives."<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">It's never been easier!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Or more mandatory.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(returns to conversation with JOSHUA, opens official-looking<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">letter from kitchen table)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(points to letter)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Does that say that I get to beat up<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Madison Mendez?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>JOSHUA'S MOM</b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b></b><o:p></o:p></span><span style="font-family: Courier;">(phony laugh) Oh, honey! These are<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">the results of your assessment.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">You passed! </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">So no glue rendering plant for you, little guy! </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">Not this fiscal year...</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(JOSHUA, MOM, and MALE ANNOUNCER laugh together)<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><b>FEMALE ANNOUNCER</b><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">(voice over)</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; text-autospace: none;"><span style="font-family: Courier;">The Sunshine Commission. Healthcare reform you can believe in.</span></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-39482569680925995142010-02-28T19:02:00.009-06:002010-03-18T14:02:06.378-05:00Top Ten Teabagger Movies<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTl1tzDqRQgEhc1iCTiL7B8qZONiER_5IJ1YZPqbDIJ8GsmYX_yNnRIkn24oYw0lqrIaqccf7XaBn3myM0XHZij4EuXxD9xObTvheRLEUb_iJIMJP_ouJPwwIrdaosb1uf07qCfs3BdJU/s1600-h/shining.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTl1tzDqRQgEhc1iCTiL7B8qZONiER_5IJ1YZPqbDIJ8GsmYX_yNnRIkn24oYw0lqrIaqccf7XaBn3myM0XHZij4EuXxD9xObTvheRLEUb_iJIMJP_ouJPwwIrdaosb1uf07qCfs3BdJU/s320/shining.jpg" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">From those <a href="http://twitter.com/McConnellsJowls">fleshy fiends-a-flappin', Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell's jowls,</a> may I present: </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">AMERICA'S TOP 10 TEA PARTY MOVIES</span></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">10. <b><i>Throw Logic From the Train</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">9. <b><i>A Padded Room With A View</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">8. <b><i>The Pursuit of Crazyness</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><i><a name='more'></a></i></b></span><br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">7. <i><b>Crouching Bagger, Hidden Deficit</b></i></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">6. <b><i>Postcards From the Edge</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">5. <b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><b><i>What's Reality Got To Do With It</i></b></span></i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">4. <b><i>Brain Dead Man Walking</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">3. <b><i>Eternal WHARRGARBLL of The Spotless MInd</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">2. <b><i>Six Degrees of Separation From Reality</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">1. <b><i>Love in The Time of Jowls: The Joe Lieberman/Mitch McConnell Story</i></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">(Those face flaps o' family values are always good for a few laughs. And catching fried chicken crumbs.) </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Special mention to fellow socialist Muslins on Twitter: </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Apes of Wrath"</span> by </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">@bspeaks , </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Womb Raiders"</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"> </span> by @60th_street, </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 16px;"><strong style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Coultergeist" </span></span></span></strong><span style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">by</span></span></span><strong style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span></strong><span style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">@sunnystill, </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"The Crying Game, starring Glenn Beck"</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> @Life0Riley, </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Saving Private Ryan from Gay Soldiers"</span> </span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">by</span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 16px;"><span style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">@</span></span><a class="tweet-url username" href="http://twitter.com/CrookdRiverWmn" rel="nofollow" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">CrookdRiverWmn</span></span></a><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">,</span></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; line-height: normal;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 16px;"><span style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium; line-height: normal;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 16px;"><span style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></span></i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Three Men and an Airport Bathroom" </span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">@AgeOfMastery, </span></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"The Fake Telephone Repairman Always Rings Twice" <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">&</span></span></span></span></span></b><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"> "A Clockwork Boehner"</span></span></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #444444;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"> </span>@YesBiscuit. Fuck yeah, @YesBiscuit !</span></span></span></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></b></span></b></span></span></span></b>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-41132218059889846902010-02-24T23:46:00.006-06:002010-03-18T14:02:31.735-05:00But What Position Would Joe the Plumber Take? Actually, No. I Don't Want To Know.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjQcuUnauSJCVzyaCwDBlGu6_8iXIzWUjLPlUYuuuV5d35v01hDvu8EOnXDhI_T-8g4Hxugd4mwcYkRh6x8fs4Grfh5whpmW25j2Ih97HAlOoxWlPMKiuAKE-MxnkRcUyt06yn1wy4SPs/s1600-h/gippersocilmeds.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjQcuUnauSJCVzyaCwDBlGu6_8iXIzWUjLPlUYuuuV5d35v01hDvu8EOnXDhI_T-8g4Hxugd4mwcYkRh6x8fs4Grfh5whpmW25j2Ih97HAlOoxWlPMKiuAKE-MxnkRcUyt06yn1wy4SPs/s320/gippersocilmeds.jpg" /></a></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Hark! A great wailing and gnashing of teeth has finally reached the heavens.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Is it the uninsured? </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Nope.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">It's the GOP brass, bleating that tomorrow's Health Care Summit at the Blair House is nothing but a trap, deviously laid by the White House to embarrass them. By forcing them to tell people watching at home (in between jacking off to <a href="http://www.ibeatyou.com/blog/2010/01/21/funniest-chat-roulette-pictures/">Chatroulette</a>) their policy positions on live TV (television.)</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>How about this for a trap: Have the Democrats propose legislation mandating a comprehensive and refreshing wipe from front-to-back after each use of the toilet. </b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Then sit back and watch Congressional Republicans <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">angrily insist that the Founding Fathers mentioned dingleberries in the Constitution. <i>And the Bible.</i></span><i> </i></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">"DON'T TREAD ON MY FREEDOMS TO......................."</span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Eh. Forget it. </span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-56906579519508158202010-02-22T20:52:00.001-06:002010-02-22T20:53:29.232-06:00"Infatuated" Man Stalks VP Biden at Olympics, Stopped By Canadian Mounties<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">The </span><a href="http://www.vancouversun.com/news/Mounties+intercept+infatuated+within+metres+Vice+President+Biden/2577968/story.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">news article</span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> didn't specify if he was gay, or just Biden-Curious.</span></span></span><br />
<div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><br />
</span></span></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13px;"><br />
</span></span></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-49951066341625828352010-02-16T18:40:00.009-06:002010-03-18T14:03:00.623-05:00Shocking New GOP Poll Results<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-a53u_K_GtTQ9opkdvJwXmupBH-vuSAFo3Lja2x686tAHDwpgHghwbqcXCrLneUYsXDI84T7OM6qOlAm63Gu37d9C9EHKZQFvLFc9PJbJZ7DxrXG0WZvWIj3NRCt0RkBmxeHrql3UU9I/s1600-h/bertcertifct.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-a53u_K_GtTQ9opkdvJwXmupBH-vuSAFo3Lja2x686tAHDwpgHghwbqcXCrLneUYsXDI84T7OM6qOlAm63Gu37d9C9EHKZQFvLFc9PJbJZ7DxrXG0WZvWIj3NRCt0RkBmxeHrql3UU9I/s320/bertcertifct.jpg" /></span></a></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>You may have heard that polls have recently been released showing that 63% of Republicans believe Obama is a socialist…and that 11% of Conservatives think that Hawai’i is </b></span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>not part of the United States</b></span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>, or were unsure*. Yeah. </b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b><br />
</b> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="color: black;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><b>What other squiggly things lie under that rock? Let’s get our gloves on and find out!</b></span></span></div><blockquote><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">THE TOP 10 RESULTS OF REPUBLICAN POLLS</span></i></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">10. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">71%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> think the word </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://rawstory.com/2010/02/marvel-apologizes-screw-up-linking-tea-parties-racists/">“socialism”</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> actually means </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">mandatory gay-marriage</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a name='more'></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">9. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">32%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> think </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Bo Obama</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> <a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_1266367963179">controls interest rates at the </a></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.obamaconspiracy.org/visitor-guide/">World Bank</a></span></b></span></span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">8. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">43%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> think the war with </span><st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4D9LofMCa8A">Iran</a></span></b></st1:place></st1:country-region><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> is going on too long</span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">7. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">80%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> participated in the survey just for the </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">free <a href="http://www.stormfront.org/forum/showthread.php?t=466868&page=5">am/fm radio</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> they gave away as a prize <i>(Ed.--useful for imminent race war, perhaps?)</i></span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">6. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">24%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> are currently taking shelter from the DC snow storms in senate minority leader </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://thinkprogress.org/2009/08/26/mitch-stimulus-hypocrisy/">Mitch McConnell’s jowls</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">5. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">11%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> think </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/02/07/palin-considering-2012-ru_n_452602.html">“retard”</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> is an acceptable insult</span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">4. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">89%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> think </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp76ly2_NoI">“gay”</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> is an acceptable insult</span></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">3. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">58%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> want the </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2009/08/keep-the-government-out-of-my-medicare.html">government out!</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> of their </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">federal highway system, tap water, and fire department</span></b></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">2. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">23%</span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> believe </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://media.photobucket.com/image/proof%20of%20age%202/SUICYCO101/tupac_is_alive.gif?o=4">Tupac lives</a></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">, yo</span></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #990000;">WAIT for it-- the Number #1 shocking new poll result is..</span>.. </b></i></span><br />
<blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">1. </span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.americablog.com/2009/12/on-fox-news-percentages-dont-add-up-to.html">117%</a> </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">of Republicans</span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">believe</span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> FOX News really is “fair and balanced” !!!</span></b></blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">*Source </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.publicpolicypolling.com/pdf/surveys/2009_Archives/PPP_Release_National_819513.pdf">http://www.publicpolicypolling.com/pdf/surveys/2009_Archives/PPP_Release_National_819513.pdf</a></span><br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Also: On <a href="http://www.dailykos.com/story/2010/2/16/837725/-BREAKING!-(Un-)-Shocking-New-GOP-Poll-Results">DailyKos</a></span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-84005196562401489742009-10-28T17:31:00.015-05:002010-02-23T00:06:34.226-06:00Noted NY Post Columnist & Anti-Reform Golem, Betsy McCaughey GOES THERE<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQTlwX4q9TAUTuOTKf9SdoWs3_sjVg2ad-zUqjsfZTgOK_Pkm5-tyub9b9iX6K8FZVuULra0Ti4yWkEX_JxOm_4d_CrBn5xBJsUhfM2rFbfnEWOGL0rERpt6dtHhH7x4p1MEfWiWkQy9o/s1600-h/palin+mccaughey2112blog.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQTlwX4q9TAUTuOTKf9SdoWs3_sjVg2ad-zUqjsfZTgOK_Pkm5-tyub9b9iX6K8FZVuULra0Ti4yWkEX_JxOm_4d_CrBn5xBJsUhfM2rFbfnEWOGL0rERpt6dtHhH7x4p1MEfWiWkQy9o/s320/palin+mccaughey2112blog.JPG" /></a> Joy! Today I received an email message, personally signed and sent by none other than <a href="http://correspondents.theatlantic.com/conor_clarke/2009/07/the_rise_and_fall_and_rise_of_betsy_mccaughey.php">Betsy "Batshit" McCaughey</a>! She of <a href="http://tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/10/death-panel-originator-rails-against-kill-granny-bill.php">"Kill Granny"</a> fame. I dusted off my "Palin/McCaughey 2012" trucker hat (is there any other kind?), tucked my ponytail through the opening in the back for such things, and clicked up on it.<br />
<a name='more'></a> </div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />
WOW BETS! Under the auspices of <a href="http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2009/09/betsy-mccaugheys-infected-advocacy.html">"Defend Your Healthcare,"</a> the infamous pretend-we're-not-an-insurance-industry lobbyist-front group, Ol' Bets detailed <i><b>much, much, more</b></i> than the <a href="http://www.prospect.org/csnc/blogs/ezraklein_archive?month=02&year=2009&base_name=lies_damn_lies_and_betsy_mccau">usual batshit fiction</a> which she will employ to derail health care reform. MUCH MORE! This time Betsy-- a veritable <a href="http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/statements/2009/jul/23/betsy-mccaughey/mccaughey-claims-end-life-counseling-will-be-requi/">Old Faithful</a> of corporatized bullshit--done gone even more <i>fartherer!</i> <br />
<br />
How far is too far for a narscisstic golem like Betsy McCaughey? HOW ABOUT IF YOU ARE IN A WHEELCHAIR = YOU ARE A CLUNKER?!?<br />
<br />
Oh, yes. She. Did.<br />
<br />
Well, here it is: <br />
<blockquote>We need medical care to <b><i>avoid becoming clunkers</i> -- disabled, worn out, parked in wheelchairs</b> or nursing homes. </blockquote>(emphasis mine)<br />
<br />
Betsy! You have really outdone yourself! <i>Labeling the disabled and wheelchair-users as "clunkers"...</i>Then! she sees her own doozy and <a href="http://www.nypost.com/p/news/opinion/opedcolumnists/treating_seniors_as_clunkers_AoV9xo6kjCZHHI4sNh6ZjM">raises it a twenty</a> by afterwards feebly trying a reach-around to pin her <a href="http://gawker.com/5337724/betsy-mccaughey-liar">special sauce </a>on President Obama! (Because it wouldn't be a Betsy column if Barry wasn't somehow trying to SWALLOW GRANDMA WHOLE, <i>islamically</i>.)<br />
<br />
Christ! Cigna must be <a href="http://mediamatters.org/blog/200909280009">cutting some sweet checks</a> for this!<br />
<br />
Now we all know that the tabloid-tastic <i>New York Post </i>is where a writer goes to publish something <a href="http://www.nypost.com/p/news/harlem_and_got_behind_our_home_girl_sN9jF3mtiY0gCEqC6fjs7K">so off-the-mark</a> that no one else (not even the <i><a href="http://www.factcheck.org/2009/02/doctors-orders/">Wall Street Journal</a></i>, apparently) will publish it. (Andrea Peyser's <a href="http://www.nypost.com/p/news/harlem_and_got_behind_our_home_girl_sN9jF3mtiY0gCEqC6fjs7K">classic column</a> where she not only claimed (with a very straight face) that people in Harlem "came out for" Hillary Clinton in the 2008 Democratic primaries but managed to slip in a "faithful to my race" comment and called Obama's Hope mantra "empty" without any citation or evidence other than the voices in her head saying so, comes to mind.) Only in New York, as the saying goes. <br />
<br />
It only took a whole 10 seconds before the <a href="http://www.salon.com/politics/war_room/2009/09/14/march/index.html">4 trillion plus</a> Glenn Beck <a href="http://www.the912project.com/2009/10/28/1028-treating-seniors-as-clunkers/">9/12-ers</a> who <a href="http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/article/2009/sep/14/tea-party-photo-shows-large-crowd-different-event/">marched on the capitol</a> latched onto it as secular gospel. The tree of insanity must be watered from time to time with the lies of Betsy McCaughey and the grease of the <i><a href="http://www.newshounds.us/2009/02/19/fox_news_has_no_opinion_on_ny_post_racist_chimp_cartoon.php">New York Post</a>!</i><br />
<i> <br />
</i><br />
I wondered when Betsy would re-emerge from the sludge of the <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/25/magazine/25Key-Gowanus-t.html">Gowanus Canal</a> with a fresh and exciting new tale to tell. (I tried to warn the superfund scientists to wait until after the health care debate was over to dredge for soil samples!) One bright ray of hope--I think we have finally reached Peak Betsy.</div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-69373308180287751132009-10-16T09:01:00.029-05:002010-02-23T00:09:46.789-06:00An Open Letter to Health Insurance Reform Lie-Bot, Dr. Betsy McCaughey<div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxlcaXMELEnprfWg1JDdJfTOqOODggjPI4TMxOp6gGq29CWXJbfO2JiN_16N6bm3YE1AcT8GD9I9hk-td3FZNc9Cyx01HF-GmX0XUUZOyeVNc7teU-UcyHyhsNUpc4Rh_9I8Rl1qQVdzY/s1600-h/wsj.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxlcaXMELEnprfWg1JDdJfTOqOODggjPI4TMxOp6gGq29CWXJbfO2JiN_16N6bm3YE1AcT8GD9I9hk-td3FZNc9Cyx01HF-GmX0XUUZOyeVNc7teU-UcyHyhsNUpc4Rh_9I8Rl1qQVdzY/s320/wsj.jpg" /></a>Dear <a href="http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2009/09/betsy-mccaugheys-infected-advocacy.html">Betsy</a>,<br />
<br />
(For those of you just tuning in-- Betsy McCaughey is the 90's anti-reform cougar who has emerged from her pod yet again to prevent progressive health care reform from getting people care in places other than the emergency rooms)<br />
<br />
First off, tremendous job <a href="http://wonkette.com/411459/anthony-weiner-debates-betsy-mccaughey-for-some-reason">debating</a> Rep. Weiner in NYC and various others of late. If only they had read the bill! I think the provisions you have been exposing, like the concession to GOP leader John Boehner for a program to install <a href="http://unreasonablysafe.com/2009/08/25/boehnertanningspray/">"vitamin D solar treatment lamps"</a> in the congressional cafeterias, demonstrate an across the aisle breakdown in advocating for the real public interest.<br />
<a name='more'></a> </div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Without <a href="http://gawker.com/5337724/betsy-mccaughey-liar">someone like you</a> advocating for our side, we may have risked these bills <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2009/10/13/senate-finance-committee-approves-health-care/">somehow passing!</a></div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But I bring good tidings! Upon analysis, I think that within the specific intersection of your two bodies of work, namely (a) the </span><a href="http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2009/09/betsy-mccaugheys-infected-advocacy.html" style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Committee to Reduce Infection Deaths</a> and (b) blocking any and all health care reform by any means necessary whatsoever, you will find that your aim of reducing infection deaths <i>has already been very much achieved. </i></div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">For example, we acknowledge all of the working-class Americans who so patriotically avoid medical treatment so that the rest of us more fortunate do not have to suffer the annoyance of longer waits to see the finite number of physicians; if these people actually *did* visit hospitals and doctors with regularity, hospital-caused infection deaths would <b>increase</b>, just by virtue of the increase in users of the system.<br />
<br />
So for that, we can thank those patriotic citizens who forgo treatment, and you as well, Betsy. You seem to have achieved your goals. </div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">How about, instead of reforming the system to stop bankruptcies and foreclosures and <a href="http://consumerist.com/336654/as-cigna-insurance-waffles-on-liver-transplant-girl-dies">denial of liver of transplants for teenage girls,</a> let's show our support the same way we support our troops --let's wear some fucking ribbons! Number #1!<br />
<br />
</div>If only <a href="http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/rolling-stone-finds-smoking-gun-betsy">Philip Morris</a> were funding <a href="http://www.hospitalinfection.org/">RID</a>, surely you would have been awarded a bonus big enough with which to finally <a href="http://www.howtogogalt.com/going-galt.html">Go Galt.</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkNEeAEe3OUgeIEfVVZVvQH0ogRHRmttE5P02dgj0nry_S6MBQfBVKAulTMPI7aLwsMI37ErSj9-XEmIzFwnJdq35y3KvFA2Qj2rt_UmZxLiSbvoA4vjBuC4SrWhqiSp-PnFJLeCfsjeQ/s1600-h/misterrogersneighborhood.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392667898779852194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkNEeAEe3OUgeIEfVVZVvQH0ogRHRmttE5P02dgj0nry_S6MBQfBVKAulTMPI7aLwsMI37ErSj9-XEmIzFwnJdq35y3KvFA2Qj2rt_UmZxLiSbvoA4vjBuC4SrWhqiSp-PnFJLeCfsjeQ/s400/misterrogersneighborhood.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 66px; margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; width: 55px;" /></a><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEje8fm6eUPABZHub3c9yt8NRPoiy5bSW7o4SkISnZpOikfKtz8vF-bsDV4SBR1dhOvZn5jGr8ND2SeT5pB9dihcC5KexT3HeMv9gGUgzrq1Ef_S-9Dc3tI8RCUvRzoWDZRiOKuhkYX_eR0/s1600-h/diablone.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392667668400695010" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEje8fm6eUPABZHub3c9yt8NRPoiy5bSW7o4SkISnZpOikfKtz8vF-bsDV4SBR1dhOvZn5jGr8ND2SeT5pB9dihcC5KexT3HeMv9gGUgzrq1Ef_S-9Dc3tI8RCUvRzoWDZRiOKuhkYX_eR0/s400/diablone.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 66px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 55px;" /></a><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQLbklYJV9huRrWELByHpI0ox8rIBczFjW9uYgk5HWB2k7E6jQgsXsTcUDvxXaw99xk6XGT3BehSHwhqajLSl4BLcPAsa1rstbjt2hC8UujXhSV8XLgxqMfhgOg0RudZrXHGdirFjEMA/s1600-h/enormousheadguy.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392667754075900802" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQLbklYJV9huRrWELByHpI0ox8rIBczFjW9uYgk5HWB2k7E6jQgsXsTcUDvxXaw99xk6XGT3BehSHwhqajLSl4BLcPAsa1rstbjt2hC8UujXhSV8XLgxqMfhgOg0RudZrXHGdirFjEMA/s400/enormousheadguy.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 120px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 75px;" /></a><span style="font-family: verdana;">The Brits over at <a href="http://www.economist.com/debate/days/view/401"><span style="font-style: italic;">The Economist</span></a> (the magazine everyone who is anyone pretends to read) are apparently bereft of CNN, and therefore did not realize what Sunlight + The First Half of October have done to <a href="http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2009/09/betsy-mccaugheys-infected-advocacy.html">Infamous</a> Death Panel Diva, Betsy McCaughey's famous <a href="http://correspondents.theatlantic.com/conor_clarke/2009/07/the_rise_and_fall_and_rise_of_betsy_mccaughey.php">"OBAMA WILL SWALLOW YOUR GRANDMA WHOLE"</a> argument. So, seeking an expert to help them understand <i><b>what the hell is wrong with Americans</b></i> they invited McCaughey to advocate (lie) against healthcare reform with luminaries such as <a href="http://pbskids.org/rogers/video_goodFeeling.html">Mr. Rogers</a> (of Mr. Rogers' neighborhood), Guy With Huge Face, and Newt Gingrich.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;"><a name='more'></a> She Anglicized her "programs" to "programmes" and "Death Panels" to "Oy- They'se gonna kill your G<span style="font-family: verdana;">ran-ny" beautifully. Several members of the public did pose questions and comments for bloody ol' Batsy who responded by flapping her wings and heading back to her cave deep in the Earth's molten parts to work on her next <a href="http://consumerist.com/5381766/wsj-1999-if-this-is-a-bubble-it-sure-is-hard-to-pop"><i>Wall Street Journal</i></a> column. Here are some excerpts:</span></span><br />
<blockquote>Dear Sir,<br />
<br />
My question is directed at Mrs. Betsy McCaughey.<br />
<br />
Mrs. McCaughey,<br />
<br />
I have appreciated your diligent work reading the entire bill and doing your best to translate it to plain English.<br />
<br />
I am so very troubled with the provisions you have highlighted on your <a href="http://twitter.com/REALMcCaughey">twitter account </a>(@REALMcCaughey) namely;<br />
<br />
The sections of the bill wherein it is laid out that President Obama will swallow our nation's grandmothers whole;<br />
<br />
The section of the bill where funding for seniors' diabetic care is slashed in favor of funding the Catholic advocacy group <a href="http://www.nambla.org/">NAMBLA</a>; and<br />
<br />
The section where H1N1 flu vaccines will now be administered by ACORN; as well as<br />
<br />
The provisions for compulsory gay marriage in order to receive medical treatment.<br />
<br />
How can we, as active, informed citizens, take a stand since it seems the GOP is now siding "with history" and backing the <a href="http://www.landoverbaptist.org/sermons/senate.html">Demoncrats</a> health reforms?</blockquote><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I award Dr. Betsy five Spotted Dicks for a rather thorough analysis of an impressively large stack of randomized papers and stunning acrobatics with the doggone truth. (No, not the spotted dicks blokes get after a week in Miami-- the </span><a href="http://www.englishteastore.com/british-store-cake.html?gclid=CKD6_7v2wZ0CFVlM5QodhhtUsQ" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">british dessert!</a> )</span><br />
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<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Yes, Dr. Betsy McCaughey, terrible shill who tanked ClintonCare in the 1990's is back in action. Probably to drum up business for whenever the healthcare reform debate is over. Tobacco Industry? </span><a href="http://www.rollingstone.com/nationalaffairs/index.php/2009/09/24/mccaughey-and-philip-morris-read-for-yourself/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Check. </a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Amorphous, behind the scenes health insurance interests? </span><a href="http://mediamatters.org/blog/200909280009" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Done, and done.</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> What's left?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"><a name='more'></a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I can picture Ol' Bets...hanging upside-down in her cave at night. Pondering, plotting, whispering softly to herself in a raspy murmur, "Where else could maximum fuckery still be rained down on the American people?</span>"<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Let's see....Defense? I bet those blokes at the </span><a href="http://councilfor.cagw.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=12146&news_iv_ctrl=0&abbr=CCAGW_" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">F-22 Raptor</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> company would write some serious checks!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Nah-- too late on that one. Being a secret operative for a defense conglomerate is a bit cliche for Beasty. Besides, incorporating "Americans to Reduce Bombing All Over You" just seems too obvious at this point. (And would probably not <a href="http://www.thehealthcareblog.com/the_health_care_blog/2009/09/betsy-mccaugheys-infected-advocacy.html">pay $160k per year</a> anyway.)<br />
</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Maybe she could advocate for the financial services industry...That means she needs to hurry up an set up an </span><a href="http://www.hospitalinfection.org/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">astroturfy advocacy group</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> for foreclosed inner-city grandmothers or something (If there are even any left after Obamacare hitler-bots synthesize them and turn them into </span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Sp-VFBbjpE" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">a nutritious protein source.</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> We'll see.)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">How about the food industry? She can sneak around, sneezing on salad bars at Wendy's and tearing down the "Employees must wash hands before returning to work" signs and whatnot, and then form some "Committee For Protecting American Salads" <a href="http://www.hospitalinfection.org/">for cover.</a><br />
</span><br />
<div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I don't give a damn how you do it. SOMEBODY just <span style="font-weight: bold;">buy her off</span> of this fucking healthcare thing so my <a href="http://health.howstuffworks.com/pre-existing-condition.htm">pre-existing'd</a> Mom can get on some Public Plan already.<br />
<br />
For sure someone out there is looking to rent a gently-used shill? Her <a href="http://twitter.com/REALMcCaughey">twitter</a> says she can "crush legislation between her powerful thighs!"<br />
<br />
And she has her own column in the <a href="http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124536864955329439.html"><span style="font-style: italic;">Wall Street Journal.</span></a> I the back, right next to the mail-order brides, sucky-sucky, and sea-monkey adverts.<br />
<br />
So get out your checkbooks, boys. I think <a href="http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/rolling-stone-finds-smoking-gun-betsy">Philip Morris</a> set the pay scale pretty high for Ol' Beasty. Champagne wishes and Medicare dreams!<br />
<br />
Let's send her off to go squeeze the bread too hard at the Safeway or something.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.rbguy.dailykos.com/storyonly/2009/10/7/790537/-DL21C-and-Young-Invincibles-UNDER-FIRE-for-Censoring-McCaughey-Weiner-Debate-w-photos">Vote in the Survey @ DailyKos</a></div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-36667613297185786772009-10-06T22:15:00.012-05:002010-03-01T22:28:13.707-06:00DL21c and Young Invincibles Under Fire for Refusing My Questions<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC7yVaYXq49rjJyD0CDasPzmqs2gBXL_hISoxz9Hus0CkonweKd3WNjT57cxvN-2jDsTRfbJPjmIdkylcDEDYYFmUzLMZTppitM0jXe_b-4maqVZ2mmbJ9q-EPR20RVR-0CzlwEKIAcZw/s1600-h/motobetsy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC7yVaYXq49rjJyD0CDasPzmqs2gBXL_hISoxz9Hus0CkonweKd3WNjT57cxvN-2jDsTRfbJPjmIdkylcDEDYYFmUzLMZTppitM0jXe_b-4maqVZ2mmbJ9q-EPR20RVR-0CzlwEKIAcZw/s320/motobetsy.jpg" /></a></div><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">First health reform scare-golem Betsy Mccaughey came for Hillarycare, and I said nothing, because I was like ten years old or something. Then she came for Barry Hussein-care, and decided that I would find the answer to the burning question of our time: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"><br />
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Who Is Renting Betsy McCaughey? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"><a name='more'></a></span><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I submitted my questions ahead of time, as asked.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Yet neither the </span><a href="http://www.dl21c.org/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">DL21c</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> nor the </span><a href="http://www.younginvincibles.org/index07.html" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Young Invincibles </a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">had the sackular fortitude to pose </span><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms'; font-style: italic;">even one</span><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> of my questions to <span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">our flaxen-haired guest, <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/08/dickipedia-betsy-mccaughe_n_314236.html"><span style="font-weight: bold;">Betsy McCaughey</span></a>. </span></span><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">(Many still do not know that Betsy was not born in PA, but was actually formed in a laboratory--in a manner not unlike that of Frankenstain-- from a fuzzy mole </span><a href="http://www.phyllisschlafly.com/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Phyllis Schlafly</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> had removed from her armpit after WWII.)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I smell a conspiracy.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I smell a socialism.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Read the questions that *nobody* is asking. </span><a href="http://notsofreshfeelings.blogspot.com/2009/10/and-by-lincoln-douglas-style-debate.html" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Except NSFF. </a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Stay tuned.</span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-61605901384245703632009-10-05T10:25:00.038-05:002010-02-23T00:13:04.489-06:00And By "Lincoln-Douglas Style Debate" They Mean "Wingnuts Will Be Frisked for Weapons at the Door"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKuG8JL0ZI0s1ex_lWB0iQ1kPdAKAHvI0Js-QtUjeVw620AJkE0Vg9fJLv7nNpIqS7hxhunZDbkvP6xI67pLwIf2wYXgDnQsPNlR7U7nDURomkh0vmkL627m0oxKW2oA2goB1V8PXDhAM/s1600-h/betsphoto.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5389165509091424978" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKuG8JL0ZI0s1ex_lWB0iQ1kPdAKAHvI0Js-QtUjeVw620AJkE0Vg9fJLv7nNpIqS7hxhunZDbkvP6xI67pLwIf2wYXgDnQsPNlR7U7nDURomkh0vmkL627m0oxKW2oA2goB1V8PXDhAM/s400/betsphoto.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 190px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 260px;" /></a><br />
<div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Friends, Space-Muslims, and Countrymen:</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Tonight I will alight upon the not-a-townhall healthcare debate <a href="http://www.dl21c.org/">thing</a> put on by the <a href="http://www.dl21c.org/index.php">DL21c</a> and <a href="http://www.younginvincibles.org/home.html">Young Invincibles</a> in NYC. Noted performance artiste <a href="http://gawker.com/5337724/betsy-mccaughey-liar">Betsy McCaughey</a>, author of <i><a href="http://www.tnr.com/article/politics/no-exit">No Exit: Obama Will Swallow Grandma Whole</a></i>, will be there to play Alan Colmes to Rep. Anthony Weiner's Sean Hannity. Or maybe Roy to Weiner's Seigfreid. Or maybe she is going to Seigfried his Weiner. Either way, I will report, you will decide.</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">I have submitted a few questions for Bets myself via the <a href="http://www.dl21c.org/">event webpage</a>:<br />
<a name='more'></a></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>In 1994, </b><a href="http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/story/30219673/the_lie_machine/print"><b>Philip Morris tobacco covertly paid you</b></a><b> to pen a fantasy trilogy in the literary style of H.P Lovecraft entitled, </b><i><a href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-05-15/the-woman-who-killed-health-care/"><b>“No Exit: A Gay Abortions Story”,</b></a></i><b> which is widely credited with stopping the Clinton reforms that could have saved hundreds of thousands of American lives. </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>How many ghosts of people who were denied care do you see at night when you turn off the lights? </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">A) I thought they were imaginary friends</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">B) Many. Never the same ones twice, though </div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">C) None, Rushbo has the best hookup for “Ambien" from "Thailand"</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"></span></i><br />
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"><div><b>Folks like </b><a href="http://www.slate.com/id/2084316/"><b>Jayson Blair and Stephen Glass</b></a><b> have been liberated to pursue fulfilling new careers in fields different from writing for newspapers, but your similar cries for help in the form of entertaining </b><b><a href="http://sbk.online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203706604574374463280098676.html?mod=rss_Today%27s_Most_Popular">op-eds </a>where outdated or wholly invented "facts" are <a href="http://www.dcpages.com/gallery/Taxpayer_March_on_DC/DSC08264.jpg.html">paraded </a>out like bloody sheets after a tribal muslim wedding, </b><b>continue to be championed as real and true by the </b><a href="http://www.salon.com/opinion/conason/2009/07/31/bill_betsy/index.html"><b>flying monkeys</b></a><b> of the corporate right. Are you</b></div><div><br />
</div><div>A) Boiling with jealousy over the intervention Jayson and Stephen got</div><div><br />
</div><div>B) Just a little envious <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">that someone cared enough about them to <a href="http://factcheck.org/archives/search-results/?cx=006313184908531579811:hm8n5-dxba0&cof=FORID:10;NB:1&ie=UTF-8&q=mccaughey&sa=Search">fact-check</a> their work<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"> or</span></span></div><div><br />
</div><div>C) SOMEBODY PLEASE STOP ME WHY DON’T YOU LISTEN PLEASE THESE UNBELIEVEABLE, WHOLLY FABRICATED RANTS AGAINST <a href="http://www.pbs.org/moyers/journal/07102009/transcript2.html">MIDDLE-CLASS PEOPLE BEING ABLE TO ACTUALLY GO TO THE FREAKIN’ DOCTOR </a>ARE A CRY FOR HELP CHRIST, EVEN <a href="http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2343263/posts">ORLY TAITZ </a>WOULD HAVE BEEN SANCTIONED BY NOW STTTTTOOOOOPPPPP MMMMEEEEEEEE PLEEEEEASE</div><div><br />
</div></span></i></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Because blogging and internet commentary in general were not around in 1994 to swiftly expose your </b><a href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-05-15/the-woman-who-killed-health-care/"><b>tobacco-sponsored</b></a><b> right wing fan-fiction, and you were able to somehow wrest a lucrative career from the arms of the </b><a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/blogs/2009/09/30/politics/politicalhotsheet/entry5354012.shtml"><b>bloated corpse of truth</b></a><b>, are you</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">A) Grateful-there really was only talk-radio back then</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">B) Relieved, just made it through before Youtube!</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">C) Wikipedia is a vast left-wing conspiracy</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Since the evidence strongly suggests that you are </b><i><b>at best</b></i><b> corrupt and soul-less, and </b><i><b>at worst</b></i><b> a disturbed homonculus formed by Satan himself from his own feces in the 10th circle of Dante’s Inferno, some have claimed that the “patient advocating” you do is not <i>really</i> about advocating for actual live human patients at all, but about creating a title more sound-bite friendly than </b><i><b>“unregistered lobbyist for the health insurance industry"</b></i><b> in a manner similar to Bush gutting protection for forests under a bill entitled, </b><a href="http://www.wildcalifornia.org/publications/article-57"><b>"Healthy Forests Initiative</b></a><b>" </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>So, </b><i><b>exactly how retarded</b></i><b> do we have to be to consider you an advocate for anything other than the need to introduce punitive asylums for the politically insane?</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">A) Corky-level </div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">B) Full Palin (Sarah, of course! How terrible of you!) </div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">C) Just a touch of Aspergers </div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Betsy, I am very relieved that since </b><a href="http://www.orlytaitzesq.com/"><b>Orly Taitz</b></a><b> has been stripped of her law license she has found a satisfying new career as a hair stylist. Your ‘do looks terrific and I must say “Chernobyl-Blonde” really suits your skin type. (I am a “winter” as well!) Could you give me her number? My roots are crying out for some attention! </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Dear Bets--LOVE your TV appearances. I am a HUGE fan. I know that the </b><i><b>Wall Street Journal</b></i><b> allows you to submit your hilarious op-eds after you’ve scrawled them in purple crayon on the walls of your “chalet” (as the orderlies call it! Isn’t that sweet of them) My question is this: Isn’t it expensive for </b><a href="http://www.abcnews.go.com/Travel/BusinessTravel/story?id=4581229&page=1"><b>Bellvue </b></a><b>to keep replacing sections of the padding material on the wall just so you can submit your column every week? You must have EXCELLENT insurance to cover all that! </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Q:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>Is “cancer” <i>actually</i> you? What </b><a href="http://www.rollingstone.com/photos/gallery/30234884/inside_the_lie_machine_documents"><b>evidence </b></a><b>do you have that you are an actual person with a potential for sentience and not a greedy, malignant mass on the unsuspecting lymph node of progress?</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">A) I have an running spot in the <i>Wall Street Journal. <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;">Ok, I guess I have no evidence!</span></i></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">B) Hey- how many parasitic growths have been on the <a href="http://jezebel.com/5342451/the-daily-show-betsy-mccaughey-provides-dramatic-interpretation-of-health-care-bill">Daily Show</a>?</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">C) <i><a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/Vote2008/story?id=5782924&page=1">In what sense, Charlie?</a></i></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>LAST ONE, I PROMISE:</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>You have been called the Sarah Palin of the 90's, in the sense that you emerged through what is now recognized as the standard operating procedure for debuting republican "ideas": an alternating current of thrilling/terrifying-- all fireworks, jazz hands, and Neiman Marcus businesswear-- eventually crashing back down to the "reality plane," where the rest of us live. </b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><b>My question is: If Sarah Palin is also </b><i><b>totes</b></i><b> for Death Panels and you are both in the same room at the same time, does that room become like a </b><a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/Vote2008/story?id=5782924&page=1"><b>particle collider</b></a><b> of matter and some kind of nazi-socialist anti-matter that will cause a black hole and end the world? And is </b><a href="http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-july-27-2009/bill-kristol"><b>Bill Kristol</b></a><b> like totally the Dr. Evil is this equation? I ask cuz I noticed that you and Sarah are never photographed together in the same place...</b></div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Your thoughts?</div>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-84251807393911215902009-09-02T09:04:00.016-05:002010-02-23T00:13:29.997-06:00Palin Punk'd? And NSFF Stumped...<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJXIG5JQ4KyBsDOgIQhGdfg7Vm7ADi8GdX8RRJrkJclkFm9MKp9BXN1OEg3CIdEmeb5FcrZMxpf7QQUHYFkNchLW3Z2UjH7BKMpgwdzbak0Gg-0J9l3gV6UJtnihsMlRCGoY0tv_l-a6Q/s1600-h/gogmagog.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5376940340518983090" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJXIG5JQ4KyBsDOgIQhGdfg7Vm7ADi8GdX8RRJrkJclkFm9MKp9BXN1OEg3CIdEmeb5FcrZMxpf7QQUHYFkNchLW3Z2UjH7BKMpgwdzbak0Gg-0J9l3gV6UJtnihsMlRCGoY0tv_l-a6Q/s400/gogmagog.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 117px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 111px;" /></a><a href="http://www.businessinsider.com/sara-palin-just-another-clsa-practical-joke-2009-9" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-style: italic;">The Business Insider</span></a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> reports this morn' that Pro-America American and Arctic Jabberwocky, Sarah Palin, has been used! Callously used, yet again!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">But this time is different! Apparently, some "Asian" investment conference </span><a href="http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2009/07/06/uighurs/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">(must be the Muslin Uighurs!)</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> has booked Mrs. Moose herself to come speak about investments(!?) </span><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Get This: BUT THEY PROBABLY DIDN'T </span><a href="http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080923161630AAdNVCN" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">MEAN IT</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"><a name='more'></a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Before y'all bombard me with comments, imploring me to layoff the ol' gal, I swear to </span><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/andrewbrown/2009/aug/10/religion-george-bush" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Gog and Magog</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> -- barring any thrilling horrorshow scenario wherein she gives birth on stage at the 2012 RNC..... this is absolutely the last post about Our Lady of Perpetual Pregnancy.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">Everyone who walks upright knows the best comedy involves a serious subject, in order to have a fulcrum on which to tilt into satire and/or absurdity. Yet, like a moth to the flame, again I rest my quill on the </span><a href="http://www.runnersworld.com/article/0,7120,s6-243-410--13221-0,00.html" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Runners' World</span></a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">-caliber haunches of America's </span><a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2009/08/republicans-looking-for-great-white-hope-to-counteract-obama-policies-congresswoman-says-she-didnt-m.html" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">Great White Hope</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">, Sarah Palin. The only people who take her seriously are the ones buying </span><a href="http://eternal-earthbound-pets.com/" style="font-family: trebuchet ms;">petcare services</a><span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';"> for after the rapture. (I actually feel approximately 50% less smart for not being the one who came up with that idea.)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">My fulcrum here is the mere fact that the bible fundamentalists put down the speaking in tongues long enough to somehow elect this woman, who by all measures would be stockin' the mooseburgers display at the Shop n'Save were she, a he. Reverse sexism, huzzah!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms';">I know what she'll say: "Hello, Oriental people. Buy shares of Neiman Marcus. There's an election coming up. Amen."</span>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-19454175603987645892009-07-27T16:07:00.005-05:002010-02-23T00:14:03.278-06:00Read Darwin's Lips: No New Taxes<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim322itX5vwRsVQpTsOdmPG_nZvbhYpqbogw5nKO8FldtrA26NlSmww-oiQ1A-PXn3g0Lbr2UdGEKHRwWDc-viBqw4XDUvz62pVN85oa5cWWhhci4NqBeyj5LV5gCpB7eLC89Pe1dJNXg/s1600-h/gop.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5363377138238358690" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim322itX5vwRsVQpTsOdmPG_nZvbhYpqbogw5nKO8FldtrA26NlSmww-oiQ1A-PXn3g0Lbr2UdGEKHRwWDc-viBqw4XDUvz62pVN85oa5cWWhhci4NqBeyj5LV5gCpB7eLC89Pe1dJNXg/s320/gop.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 198px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 200px;" /></a><span style="font-family: verdana;">Geez, Repubs. First Gov. Palin just goes and aborts Alaska, and now this!</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">North Carolina used to be as reliably Red as it was verdant and oh, so full of Clean and Proper Ladies Wearing Pearls. Until <a href="http://www.suntimes.com/news/elections/1265210,barack-obama-north-carolina110608.article">last November</a>, that is.</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">So! How to fight against poor people being able to get those fuzzy, irregular moles checked in places besides <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/07/02/insurance.purging/">barn stalls</a> and emergency rooms?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;"><a name='more'></a></span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: verdana;">With 'BERT CERTIFFICUTS!!!!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">Sorry. Wrong post.</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">With SIGNS!</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">Jeff Morse of the Wake County Republican Party wants you to get your thinkin' caps on, and spend that fat stimulus check on some patriotic glitter paint for the latest, greatest installment in the GOP's plan to <a href="http://washingtonindependent.com/51736/rep-mike-castle-fends-off-the-birthers">take their country back</a> from ACORN.</span> (Read the email in it's full splendor at <a href="http://wonkette.com/410112/republicans-gear-up-for-big-obama-protest-north-carolina-with-signs">Wonkette</a>) <br />
<br />
<blockquote><div><span style="color: #000066;">Dear Fellow Americans,</span></div><span style="color: #000066;"> </span> <br />
<div><span style="color: #000066;">As you may know our President is coming to Raleigh, NC this Wednesday. Let's line the streets and send a PEACEFUL message to him. </span></div></blockquote><br />
(Note the emphasis on PEACEFUL. Don't want any gun-hoarders to answer the <a href="http://www.thenation.com/doc/20081117/melber">dog-whistle</a> they hear daily on FOX or Limbaugh and y'know, 'Take Their Country Back") <br />
<br />
Jeff helpfully suggests some ideas for good signs, including: <br />
<br />
<blockquote><a href="" name="122baea81258436e_122b9f47bee39fb7_LETTER.BLOCK9"><span style="color: #000066;">"Darwin would have been a Republican!" </span></a></blockquote><br />
<br />
<style>
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</style><span style="font-family: verdana;">YES! That will stop Barry and his minions from treating healthcare like we do the military or even a municipal water supply and "spreading the wealth around," socialistically. <br />
<br />
UPDATE: It seems the repubs are also protesting Craigslist...this is also on the roster of signs:</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">"</span><a href="" name="122baea81258436e_122b9f47bee39fb7_LETTER.BLOCK9" style="font-family: verdana;"><span style="color: #000066;">Sell your stuff somewhere else! "</span></a> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: verdana;">Like </span><a href="http://www.gipperslist.com/?cityid=-34" style="font-family: verdana;">HERE</a><span style="font-family: verdana;">, maybe?</span><script type="text/javascript">
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</script>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1407804991646807918.post-21898461345170830872009-07-13T12:12:00.008-05:002009-11-04T15:01:08.179-06:00Apropos of Everything: "Analog" Probably is the Right Word<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmFIvc6Ue20oSt-VbakCJ9rgo5NWpgPdOMQU71wkxfrfW2Fr12T3rZTMF6sj9dUHqWPnhnJB05klpO-YnUXznaPsaiBRAUJaFZrd77qrcLCyldn8cZAXYlMROQnGR-x819auY58ILd0l8/s1600-h/one_grab.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5363384344345772066" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmFIvc6Ue20oSt-VbakCJ9rgo5NWpgPdOMQU71wkxfrfW2Fr12T3rZTMF6sj9dUHqWPnhnJB05klpO-YnUXznaPsaiBRAUJaFZrd77qrcLCyldn8cZAXYlMROQnGR-x819auY58ILd0l8/s320/one_grab.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 283px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 320px;" /></a><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">You may remember Ralph Reed, hairy </span><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/22/washington/22reed.html?_r=1" style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">right-palm of God</a><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">, former boy-scion of the Christian Coaliton, right? Beloved among scholars and thinkers, he was part of a "triumvirate" (that's Latin for "not gay") with noted political heavyweights Jack </span><a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/01/04/politics/main1176617.shtml" style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"Big Chief"</a><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Abramoff and Grover Norquist.</span><br />
<div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Reed announced today that a new political organization is a' formin'. (I confess --I quivered shamefully in excitement.)<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Reed thusly described it: <br />
</div><blockquote style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"></blockquote><blockquote style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"></blockquote><blockquote style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"...It is the political analog to the iPod and the iPhone. It would be cool."<br />
</blockquote><blockquote style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"></blockquote><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">He then went on to liken himself to Steve Jobs of Apple.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">So...Using a complex calculus wherein the relative orangeness of <a href="http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://men.style.com/images/gq/features/080106/GQfeature1v.jpg&imgrefurl=http://men.style.com/gq/features/landing%3Fid%3Dcontent_4608&usg=__WirIpSS8ZunyHRPj7XGFn4yEyDA=&h=300&w=240&sz=18&hl=en&start=5&um=1&tbnid=y50GOmEb-ARVuM:&tbnh=116&tbnw=93&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dralph%2Breed%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1T4WZPA_enUS315US315%26sa%3DN%26um%3D1">Reed's spray tan </a>is multiplied by a factor of years of defeat, we here at NSFF have concluded that this new labor of love is sort of like if Twitter and Leviticus mated in a tub of moonshine and produced an iPhone app that is actually an unassailably hetero lobbyist that walks on water while maintaining <a href="http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/christian-coalition">501 (c)(3)</a> status.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">This bright new advocacy group will allow right-leaning folk to more effectively spread their <a href="http://www.alternet.org/blogs/peek/50979/">Magic Negro</a>-brand of outreach to the dozen or so under-40<a href="http://gawker.com/5308514/young-republican-leader-finds-racism-lol+worthy"> "young" folk </a>and <a href="http://www.freerepublic.com/tag/*/index">assorted shut-ins </a>that comprise this Brave New RightWing Base.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Imagine, if you will, a Culture Wars 2.0., on it's way to an Internets near you. (1.0 produced Newt, who--with Ken Starr--knit the most important love-spackled Blue Dress of the 90's, which was later worn by Bush Dos for his Inaugural, then after that, showed up in Palin's $200k Neiman Marcus wardrobe before mutating into the H1N1 virus and killing some Mexicans).<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Norquist, you may recall, found Christ with Reed in a phone booth in a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullfeathers">Capitol Hill pub </a>after he retired from <a href="http://74.125.95.132/search?q=cache:XJrNmVMMYBMJ:www.breitbart.tv/%3Fp%3D334433+%22sesame+street%22+socialist+left+wing&cd=10&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us">popular socialist childrens' program </a>"Sesame Street." Well, he didn't <b><i>find</i></b> Christ, together, <i><b>with</b></i> Reed <i>in delicto.</i> (Heavens, no!) <br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Norquist and Reed did, however, accept the Lord into their hearts together after downing some Long Island Iced Teas and being discovered <a href="http://www.weeklystandard.com/Content/Public/Articles/000/000/005/732ujayv.asp?pg=1">in a phone booth</a> by Ronald Reagan. Or at least that is how the legend goes. Perhaps <i>"Capitol Hill Pub"</i> is actually a euphemism for something unholy, like Santorum. Or Hot Karl. Or ACORN.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Take note, heathens! Because, as one of Hebrew origins, that righteous path to sweet, hot salvation was unavailable to poor Jack Abramoff. And just look at what <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/linkset/2005/06/22/LI2005062200936.html">happened to him</a>! The fact that he currently resides in Cellblock X at Guantanamo--next to the deadly and treacherous Uighurs--is evidence to some over on the <a href="http://www.christiancinema.com/catalog/product_info.php?products_id=1137&s_kwcid=left%20behind%7C2778362216&ctt_id=2084516&ctt_adnw=Google&ctt_kw=left%20behind&ctt_ch=ps&ctt_entity=tc&ctt_adid=2778362216&ctt_nwtype=search&ctt_cli=2%5E8953%5E35062%5E560438&gclid=CMKVzoXZ95sCFSBN5QodICOo-A"><i>Left Behind</i></a> blog comments section that God Himself passed judgement on the unholy mixing of those that will head skyward at the Rapture and those that will be left back with the gays, artists, thinkers, Nobama, and other infidels.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">One last question still burned inside of me: Will this nascent hipster Christian Coalition be accepting of a white, white, snow-white person such as my pure Northern-European-descended blonde self? We are quite a beleaguered minority as of late, you know! What with Wise Latinas storming the steps of Lady Liberty and now even Don Imus can't say anything about a gal's hairstyle!<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">So I took my keyboard and did what any wholly saved and Aryan-esque Godly woman should up and do, and visited the <a href="http://www.ffcoalition.com/about/">Internet Web Site</a> for this new Movement taking Real 'Merica by storm.<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Yes! Good tidings to report! I have a full 5 bars of Jesus-reception in my heart as I report that-- judging from the photo on the splash page showing their total of five current members, all flaxen-haired and opposite-sex loving--my kind will be eagerly welcomed without, wink, <i>"changing the complexion"</i> (<a href="http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/Pool-Boots-Kids-Who-Might-Change-the-Complexion.html">as they say in Philly</a>).<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">I am just so excited for this totally rad new <a href="http://www.ffcoalition.com/">Coalition </a>that likes Freedom: It's going to be just like the Obama movement, only with <a href="http://www.politicsdaily.com/2009/05/08/alan-keyes-arrested-at-notre-dame/">bloody cabbage patch dolls </a>in strollers and global gag-rules!<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Links:<br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.ajc.com/news/content/metro/stories/2009/07/12/ralph_reed_comeback.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab">Atlanta Journal-Constitution </a><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><a href="http://politicalwire.com/archives/2009/07/13/reed_will_start_hipper_christian_coalition.html">Political Wire</a><br />
</div><br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.ajc.com/news/content/metro/stories/2009/07/12/ralph_reed_comeback.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab"></a>notsofreshfeelingshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11572206271705376388noreply@blogger.com0