Happy Ending are Forever

What do I look for in a man besides someone who won’t go out for a pack of cigarettes and never come back? The same things we all want: mental stimulation, sexual intuitiveness, and someone to tickle-fight with under our ironic snuggies.   

But to find this person, how about mixing it up a bit? Taking a novel approach to the event, how about a first date so subtly skewed that the two of you could bond over the absurdity of it?

Why, you ask, would anyone want to have a date go wrong on purpose? Simple, to have some outside force to bond in opposition to...To have some outside force to which you are in opposition--oh, fuck you grammar nazis. 

So why not head to Chinatown and try something like this? 

1.  Would you like feet with that? Find the restaurant with the most menacing hanging-poultry display you’ve ever seen and get a double order of chicken feet. Will they be relieved when you go for Thai on the second date? Will you find out they like to eat feet? Either way…win.

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