The REAL McCaughey: Champagne Wishes and Medicare Dreams!

Dr. Beasty is twatting, y'all.

Yes, Dr. Betsy McCaughey, terrible shill who tanked ClintonCare in the 1990's is back in action.  Probably to drum up business for whenever the healthcare reform debate is over. Tobacco Industry? Check. Amorphous, behind the scenes health insurance interests? Done, and done. What's left?

I can picture Ol' Bets...hanging upside-down in her cave at night. Pondering, plotting, whispering softly to herself in a raspy murmur, "Where else could maximum fuckery still be rained down on the American people?"

Let's see....Defense? I bet those blokes at the F-22 Raptor company would write some serious checks!

Nah-- too late on that one. Being a secret operative for a defense conglomerate is a bit cliche for Beasty. Besides, incorporating "Americans to Reduce Bombing All Over You" just seems too obvious at this point. (And would probably not pay $160k per year anyway.)


Maybe she could advocate for the financial services industry...That means she needs to hurry up an set up an astroturfy advocacy group for foreclosed inner-city grandmothers or something (If there are even any left after Obamacare hitler-bots synthesize them and turn them into a nutritious protein source. We'll see.)

How about the food industry? She can sneak around, sneezing on salad bars at Wendy's and tearing down the "Employees must wash hands before returning to work" signs and whatnot, and then form some "Committee For Protecting American Salads" for cover.

I don't give a damn how you do it. SOMEBODY just buy her off of this fucking healthcare thing so my pre-existing'd Mom can get on some Public Plan already.

For sure someone out there is looking to rent a gently-used shill? Her twitter says she can "crush legislation between her powerful thighs!"

And she has her own column in the Wall Street Journal. I the back, right next to the mail-order brides, sucky-sucky, and sea-monkey adverts.

So get out your checkbooks, boys. I think Philip Morris set the pay scale pretty high for Ol' Beasty. Champagne wishes and Medicare dreams!

Let's send her off to go squeeze the bread too hard at the Safeway or something.

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